Xfresh Archive: Madame E. Diot! Dream Reader Extraordinaire...

Location: Unitar workstation, hacking into Xbloggers
Mood-of-the-day: Mischievous, with a pinch of mystical

Aha! It is I, Madame Emmelias Diot! Dream Reader Extraordinaire... Yes, an extraordinaire! For I am extraordinary... I can see you are curious, yes? Curious, curious, curious, curious, curious... who am I you ask? Well, of course that's the question you should be asking, for that is the right question to ask! I am Madame Emmelias Diot! Dream Reader Extraordinaire...

But you know that already, don't you? Of course you do, for I am famous! Yes, famous, absolutely famous darling! What? You have not a clue who am I? Well, of course love, I am the psychic, not you, I am, no, no, no, no, no, oh for I am *drumroll*... Madame Emmelias Diot! Dream Reader Extraordinaire is here in this humble but lovely (yes, absolutely lovely!) little spot on-De-line to bring you into the Wonders of the Subconscious Reality (see my card below, sweetheart).

And it would I, Madame Emmelias Diot! Dream Reader Extraordinaire and only I, to sort the senseless nonsense since none is sensibly sane to sense such Sense save I. Shall we begin on the blog owner's latest yet most brilliant (yes, absolutely brilliant!) nightly musings? Of course we shall, love, oh yes! I wouldn't miss it for anything. And I know you wouldn't too, dearest, oh no, no, no, no, no...

She dreamed of her grandfather (mother's father, dear) putting a pretty kitty-puss in a sandbox before she turned and saw that she was in a rotting old ugly wooden house in the middle of a swamp! (Oh, how nasty! Bugs, mold, noisy frogs, eww...) There was nothing to eat in the house except chocolates, chocolates, and more chocolates (mmm - now it's getting delicious. Yes, absolutely delicious!).

But then a monstrously hideous alligator jumped through a hole in the wall and pinned her down! (Oh goodness, how dreadful!). It pinned her down and she sooo frightened until she woke herself up. Oh poor dear, she had quite a nightmare (alligators! Turn them into Gucci bags I'll say!). But never fear! For even in the worst of dreams, I, Madame Emmelias Diot! Dream Reader Extraordinaire never fails to find beauty (yes, absolutely beautiful!).

Hold it, hold it! I am now channelling her psyche. I see... I see great honours (yes, absolutely great!) in her community. And then, and then... she will eat a chocolate pie... and sing Ashley Simpson... oh wait a minute, that's not right! Oops, sorry honey! I've strayed into the wrong frequency (must be the a neighbour, though that darling must stay away from that pie!).

Ahh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes... I do so see great honours (oh, yes!). And, oh dear me oh my, she will meet a guy she will fall madly in love with but he'll turn out to be gay (careful, dearest!). And soon, she'll lose a lot of money (I dunno how really, but she'll better pay my advancements for services soon!).

And oh! Her future's isn't so-so bright for she will fall ill (oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear...). And aww, the poor thing, she'll fall from high grace. Oh what a horrible future is in store for this precious (yes, absolutely precious!). But she will have to face it, for I can see... I see... I know it will happen today!

So sweethearts, remember. I can tap into your dreams (oh yes! I can) and see your fortune (or otherwise, oh dear...). I know you are impressed by my skills, yes? Well, of course I know you do and I also know you know I know, oh my pretties. And remember, should you worry of such nightly visions, you can always look for me, Madame Emmelias Diot! Dream Reader Extraordinaire...

Signed: Madame E. Diot, Dream Reader Extraordinaire - "Get some beauty sleep, darling..." - aka Part-Time Hacker