Dreamy Wishes...

Location: In a happy place that doesn’t include padded walls and white straitjackets
Mood-of-the-day: Thinking happy thoughts without the need for drugs

Just for today, this post is dedicated to TWENTY of each and every one that is my wishes, needs, wants, whims, childish maybe, happiness, dreaminess, craziness, joys, laughter, and a whole line of events that made me simply being... me :D

1. Well, being me!
2. That I have all my family with me.
3. Well, yeah, Bro-in-Law included *big, big, cheeky grins*
4. That I have a room all to myself.
5. That I have this little animation!

I liked the pretty colours :)

6. That there’s a place for me to act really crazy!
7. And everybody can see me!
8. Of course it’s this Blog! :D
9. That I loved searching for great pics
10. And that I loved being a Virgo

One of my nicks was Starlight Virgo

11. That fantasy is my medium.
12. That fish are friends (that’s why I don’t eat ‘em! :P)
13. That I don’t have to be beautiful to feel beautiful.
14. That it’s just so easy to write this entry!
15. That I have a pic for every five sentence

If only my bedroom window could look this good every morning...

16. Regrets, I have a few~... But then again, too few to mention... Frank Sinatra
17. That I can busybody read the personal lives of diffent people :P (see *Chosen Ones*)
18. Going to KL tomorrow for that elusive thumb drive
19. So I can download free games and try them on my dad’s laptop (my PC’s still dead!)
20. Finding this Baby Card recently

Straight from Assunta Nursery ;)

Signed: *Ophie, wished she knew a printer shop in PJ that could turn these Jpegs into posters...

September 17th Entry and Unforeseen Tragedy

Location: Suvon Reality
Mood-of-the-day: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

On this day, I was born. And I woke up to start a new day for the rest of my life first by enjoying a healthy first meal...

Gardenia toasted bread under a Kraft Singles cheddar based, topped in dripping Sloppy Joe mince beef and covered in a snow blanket of bold, strong flavourful Parmesan cheese

Well, maybe healthy was not the word for it. My dad caught me taking this photo at my food and being used to my eccentricities (a polite way of saying “You damn crazy woman!”) just gave me a bear hug and wished the proper greeting. If it were my mom though, she’ll be a sour faced since she served oranges and bananas for breakfast (though it might have been the oranges that made her sour :P).

So how did the group meeting on movie making go? Well, other than the fact that neither one of us gals knew how to operate an un-user friendly program as stated in the assignment (which some aren’t even available in the school’s PCs), the stupid firewall dropped on us as we killed some precious time downloading the Matrix trailer only to find an ‘Operation restricted’ warning sign.

So we spend much on brainstorming a storyboard aided by the clean-cut Jpegs and animated Gifs on the Warner Bros website. I purposed a story that Neo and Trinity were on the verge of making out when Hello Kitty came strolling in and screamed that Neo was her boyfriend and that Barbie had ditched ran off with Justin Timberlake since his 24.5th girlfriend is dating the Hangman stick, who was Trinity’s secret lover.

Nope, no story surfaced. I must have scared them. Next meeting is next week after no-class hour. Maybe then I’ll give them a real horror story, if they hadn’t come up with theirs yet. But if you’re really into horror stories, here’s a most terrifying one. What makes this even scarier is that it happened just last night and I’ve still got my heartbeats on adrenaline. What happened to me was...

MY PC DIED!! Oh tragedy, tragedy, tragedy, tragedy! Oh agony, agony, agony, agony! The horror! Oh, why? Why? WHY?!!

Wo~oosh! Even now that I got the melodramatic outta my system (for the umpteenth time since I woke up), my lil’ old Sapura-made Box of Digital Utility still seemed to be exhaling its last binaries. I first noticed a different when there was a funny, short noise repeatedly, like something was stuck again and again. If hard drives could cough, I’m sure mine just did.

Following safety drills, I took out CDs and diskettes before restarting. Just did a scan disk and defrag only two weeks ago too. Then a cheerful lil’ message told me to insert the boot disk. Damn! Of the 20+ diskettes I have on my table, neither one is a boot disk. Must take advanced maneuvers. This old baby is almost 6 years on a Windows 98. It’s been through two house moving, various pirated software, countless checkups and hundred and hundreds of carefully typed word documents. I ain’t letting it go just yet!

Signed: *Ophie, aged 19 years, 11 months, 4 weeks, 2 days, 19 hours and 20 minutes.

Three Stories on One Wednesday

Location: Unitar workstation, pc no. 100 + 70 + 7 = ?
Mood-of-the-day: You only got a hundred years, to live...

Most of the day was just staring vacantly at the school lab’s PC and musing about all the things I could do with if I had a thumb drive (Yay to ashrufzz! Maybe I will check Low Yat Plaza out). Other than that, it was banging my head on the keyboard because though Blogspot said the new entry was published, checked the main page and saw otherwise. Then was let out of the school compound in a white straitjacket.

I dunno but some of you may be wondering why was there a post on a Thursday, when technically, I don’t go to school on Thursdays (though my mom’s always eager to get outta the house for some reason). I’m having a group-brainstorming day today; need to figure out what 2-minute movie we’re going to make. The rule is that we can use any program as long as some sources must be from all the trailers from The Matrix. Here’s a question for ya, how are we going to download trailers when the firewall won’t let us?

Well, a sure lot of people were born in September (Christmas, New Year, go figure...). Apparently Dark One’s is celebrating the anniversary of his Earthly existence today and so is my Bro-in-Law! They’re ages um, and, er... ooo~oops, I never figured out the years of either one. Well, I don’t suppose they’ll thank me for blabbing it out but IMHO, birthdays comes only once a year and only about 100 years in a lifetime so enjoy all the birthdays you can get!

Well after a school of making new group members for this multimedia movie-making project (Yes, we have to make a MOVIE!), I left school in slightly better spirits than the sleepyhead-ness of the day before. But once I’ve crossed the street to get to my car, I’ve lost the key! Yes, for the first time since I’ve driven my mom old, rickety Proton, the lil’ set of metal lock openers with a dirty old Star Sports tag could not be found anywhere!

It wasn’t until I peeked inside the car that I’ve left the keys in the ignition! There’s a trick for me to lock the car doors without the keys and so I didn’t realized I had left them inside until I actually saw my near-fatal mistake through the window. I was save by two lucks yesterday. One is that my car didn’t run away with another driver (thank God!). The other is that as I have a trick to lock the doors, I have another trick to unlock them and drive home quietly (Kak emma, please don’t tell mak & ayah :P ).

On a lighter note, my cat’s seeing somebody. Morning is usually when both Patchy and Dusty (still no connection to Dustyhawk :P) would fight over who gets to eat breakfast first. But a lone feline was enjoying his first meal when I got downstairs this morning. According to family members, Dusty’s been courting a neighbour’s kitty.

Definitely female cos Dusty’s a big coward in front of rough street cats. He was last seen strolling around the neighbour’s swimming pool when they reported it to us. It’s the one with the expansive materials. Being the son of a Persian kitty, I knew he always had good taste.

Signed: *Ophie, making sure that her Proton keys are definitely with her.

Rebirth Endless

Unstopping, unfading,
But death still marks the end.
Returning, rewriting,
And life begins again.
Who sets the pathways of my existence?
How will I find the sleep without resistance?

I don't want to believe there's an afterlife
I don't want to go through another death
I don't want to be stuck from the inside
I don't want to endure this endless pattern
I don't want to make and remember new hopes
I don't want to loose them all over again

And again...
And all over again...

I'm the sole master of my Infinity
But it never was or shall ever be me
who turns the phases of my Eternity
To define and assume divinity
I misuse my every mortality
And pretend that I was above humanity.

Yet I never ever reached and touch the truth
Yet I never did open and fill my void
Yet I never proved what's right or wrong
Yet I never found that one clear line
Yet I never went beyond my reflection
Yet I never could start all over again

Once again...
And all over again...

Unstopping, unfading,
I am a wanderer.
Returning, rewriting,
I journey forever.
Who sets the rules and limits of my state?
How will I find the way to complete my fate?

In that place between Phasing
Where nothing is the same as everything

What will I wish to see?
That all chaos to fall in a unity;
Or all equals to dance in a symmetry?

But I just need one sign,
Other than drifting through the flowing of time,
I beckon and hold the lucid soul that's mine.

I am Reborn again...
And all over again...

*-*-*-*-*

Febuary 2004
Inspired by Linkin Park

A Calling, Sleepyhead and the Wish

Location: Look out for the girl in a white straitjacket in my school.
Mood-of-the-day: 3 days before Birthday!

I was driving on the LDP to school this morning when I turned on the radio to listen to Hitz.fm (don’t I always? *snigger*). That’s when the New New Morning Crew (hey it rhymes!) announced that they’re looking for a beachfront cool spot for a Birthday Bash. Must be the one for Ross, though I had thought it was long gone.

So why am I writing this story for? Well because it’s my birthday! Well, let’s clear things a bit (hee hee~). My big double decade mark (TWO-OUH) won’t actually be here until this Friday (September 17!). I thought of doing something I’ve never don’t before and that is adding extra bills on my sis’s Maxis by calling up Hitz.fm radio! Haha, I never paid for my phone calls, though my sis would probably haunt me about this in the future.

A nice Hitz.fm guy answered my *to~ooot-to~ooot*. I didn’t expect the actual Morning Hyperactive Guys to answer (must all that sponsored Nescafe). Still, I told him that it doesn’t matter where they’re holding the Birthday Bash (Kuantan/Penang but Kuching and Kt. Kinabalu? Sorry...) as long as I’M IN IT!! It’s my Birthday this Friday, I’m running out of my teens and I want to do something different!

The guy went ‘awww’ and said that it’ll be great to have me there. Actually, for all I know, there might have been a good many other Virgos calling up for the Birthday Bash and he’s just reading from a used paper slip (*bleah!*). In truth, there’re no big plans for the weekend actually. A family affair, maybe at this Turkey restaurant my sis had mentioned.

Yesterday had just rendered me to ‘exhausted sleepy person’. I had a two-class day on Tuesdays and absorbed nothing more than a Must-Have-Members-For-Project buzzing in my ear. I thought the extreme tiredness must be effect of the late night game of Pokemon Blue (again!). I’ve just discovered that this game does contain a cheat code, one that involves the Old Man who loves Coffee and the land-ocean border on the right side of Cinnabar Island.

*Ahem* Not that I actually used cheating acts while playing PC Games but let’s get back to the real subject! When the sleepyhead-ness prolonged all the way to the evening (dropped my head a couple of times in both classes), I’ve concluded this theory. Late nights, lunch avoidance and heavy fast food before you go to sleep equals the American Diet. Oops.

But most of all, I’m looking for this!

USB flash memory stick with 128Mbytes

No, it’s not an orgasm stimulator, you pervert, you. It’s a thumb drive. I’m looking for one since I’ve started saving Mangacity’s scanlations from the Internet. Unfortunately, 1.4 Mbytes diskettes could only save so much jpegs. Oh the misery of unable to download free games from Download.com! Umm, and ye~eeah, I need it to save files from projects so that one of my group member can burn it into her CD...

Signed: *Ophie, living in the Penis- I mean, Peninsular Malaysia

My First Crush

Location: Gone fishing for love
Mood-of-the-day: Fish ain’t biting because I forgot the bait

I was surfing through various blogs that I like to visit (you know who you are *snigger*) and not a few mentioned openly about their love life. There was one whose taking a long trip overseas and how her boyfriend had been so very nice to her on their last day. And a trip to Xfresh articles caught my attention about this one. Shoot, Where did that Prince Charming go?

Until my age had reached the double digit, boys were the other half of human species that you fight a good fight with (even those that weren’t related). But after a holiday trip to Johor, instincts started to get weird (thought it might have been the country side effect). I brought myself a green school bag that I was so sure nobody else at primary school had it. Oh the green-eyed jealousy!

That’s when I saw my first crush. Didja ever think about the first time you looked at a guy differently? I did and it was my new green bag that led me to him. I was an obscure gal who hung around the rough and tumble folks and already a stubbornness to match any teenager twice my 10 years. And he was a good boy, clean record, and potential head prefect with lots of straight-As friends. And he had my green bag.

It was an afternoon session class and kids back then dropped off their heavy book luggage just outside the school hall. When the bell rang, everybody scramble into a riot, as if lives were depended on the race to get in line. When the smoke and brats had cleared, I realized that my bag was dead missing. You know at that age, when you’re afraid and running behind on the race, you feel like crying. Childish yes, but I was a child.

That’s when he came. His name was Harith, as written on his nametag. Being a prefect, he was doing the rounds of clearing the hall’s corridor and to catch any stray student. I thought he was going to report me (I was ready to bludgeon him if he dared). But then I noticed he was carrying two bags, one on each shoulder. Both bags were completely identical, except for the red-blue ribbon weave on one.

He handed my bag without even asking if it was mine. I was surprised because I had for sure there not been any other kid with a bag like mine. Apparently he thought the same thing too and he apologized for taking mine. It was an odd feeling, having a guy who apologized to me for something he did. The boys I was used to would boast how they drop a dead rat into the girls’ bathroom.

Remember, I was 10 and girls can either hang on to their mommies’ apron or break stereotyping. And his curly-haired boy (he was the same age as mine) was breaking my perception of the opposite sex. We parted ways after that encounter, but I always see him as he grows up the popularity. Never talked to him again since we’re both so different. Maybe I was started to get shy. It was long after I last saw him at a goodbye primary school party that I realized that I had my very first crush.

Signed: *Ophie, too bad that she had let that fish get away...

Saturday Night Musings!

Location: A place where there seemed to be a blog in every other PC
Mood-of-the-day: Pick a mood, any mood :P

Can you imagine? After that entire running back and forth between Mid Valley and Kt. D’sara and I still can’t get online. Now it’s definitely not the laptop’s problem because Telekom never got around to give our driver for this modem! Ooh, I give up! From now on, all browsers I’m using to get online with will come with a firewall. Well, it’s Saturday, 11th September 2004 and I’m on a late night musings.

1. It’s 9/11!
2. I’m looking out but I don’t see any airplanes crashing into any buildings.
3. But I do see an Indon construction worker peeing behind his wooden hut.
4. My sis got Home just so she could watch MTV Music Video Awards.
5. And then she left.
6. Is nudity really an art?
7. Who invented the fig leaf censor cover for men anyway?
8. I’m playing Pokemon again!
9. Because my Tamagotchi pet had just died.
10. Oh Verbatim, why didja have to go?! (Overly dramatic tone)

11. I still haven’t got my batik to the tailor yet.
12. The family decided not to go to Outback at Bintang Walk this Friday
13. There’s this Turkey restaurant my sis had suggested.
14. I wonder if I should include a comic strip in my blog?
15. Question is which comic strip can I use?
16. My mom prefers me in traditional dresses.
17. My dad prefers me in shirt and jeans.
18. I prefer more clothes!
19. For some reason, I just had to eat half a chicken at Megamall today
20. I still love Sloppy Joes!

21. I’m going to Atria DJ for a book/ PC Game/something.
22. I’m just so damn bored!
23. I think Smallville sucks.
24. The cats are bouncing around me room again.
25. Dusty is the name of my littlest kitty (no connection to Dustyhawk)
26. It seems to get harder to write a Musing every week.
27. Same thing goes with the Chaos Circles.
28. Chickens don’t fly because...
29. I wish for one of those small sized, big Megabyte, USB secondary storage
30. But I got no money (Wa~aaaH!!)

31. Now the bathroom light’s started blinking.
32. My mom wants to teach me how to make bubur lambuk
33. I just like to eat them.
34. I sell old newspaper for extra money allowance.
35. I have no class on Monday!!

Signed: *Ophie, going to school anyway... ;)

The Chaos Circles #10

The hall suddenly fell into a silence at the mage’s last word; broken only by sudden gasps, rough whispers and mutters from the crowds. The mage had paused, either waiting for the information to sink into the Heads or simply to catch his own breath. But if any of the Heads showed some emotions, they looked more solemn than ever. Lya felt someone held on to her right hand and saw that it was her mother. Her eyes had grown very wide.

Handred Samuelson nodded for the mage to continue, his wrinkled face looked hard. Chris inhaled deeply.
“The enemies that held its sword against us are the Skylander provinces. The Nobility had confirmed at least 3 regions had gathered and stationed their armies close to the west border of Onus, which is only a kingdom and a sea-strait away from our homeland.”
The scattered voices grew in size and numbers as Mage Chris spoke.

A stray voice from the benches cried, “The Skylanders have no business with us!”
A number of voices echoed the man’s thought. Mutters and whispers continued, each made by harsh faces. Another man voiced his opinion, one that Lya managed to catch the person who said it.
“We have nothing against the Skylanders. Your message is obscure!” said Finnigan Jaymes, speaking for the first time.

Her father knocked the head of his walking stick loudly on the table, silencing the crowd. He eyes never left any of the Mages, but Lya could not really tell which one he was staring at.
“Please continue, Mage,” said Handred.
Mage Chris’s face looked more forlorn in Lya’s eyes, but his stance was ever so erect.
“It is the truth, the Skylanders have nothing against us. It is still the truth, but what they do have against is Inutqland,” said the mage.

The scattered whispers started to rise again. Lya heard a woman behind her gasped as her mother’s grip tightened. The last mage, the one Virdie thought was the strangest, raised his gaze from the table. His face showed more youth than the other three mages, but it might have been the trick of his very short black hair and his striking gold-brown eyes. It was the man’s eyes that amazed Lya the most because for some reason, it struck a sense of familiarity.

“Inutqland is a dead nation,” said a high-pitched voice.
The statement took Lya’s attention to the person standing behind the head villager’s high-backed chair. Channeler Harrietta looked as if she had her broom handy, she would have swept the Mages out with all the strength of the Mailotdottir within her. As Enatuh’s channeler, her position in any important meeting is always behind Lya’s father, no matter the gender.

And Channeler Harrietta was not finished yet. Her face was taut.
“Five hundred years had the dastardly Inutites kept themselves barricaded inside their own barren country. Their land is nothing but broken down to ashes and the barbaric people forever trying to rebuild with those ashes as their Government only cared bathing in honey-milk. Everyone has a history against Inutqland and it had all been done,” she said.

A cheer rose of a corner where many Mailot clansmen had gathered. Lya recalled the history lesson her father had taught in class. Inuqtland was one of the oldest and strongest civilisations in Evinau realm. But a sudden change of power had led to national deterioration, to a civil war and an opportunity to an open war. Since their great fall, little to no diplomatic Inutites had ventured outside their borders and hardly any traders. And all the other kingdoms and nations kept it that way.

The Head Villager rapped his stick on to the table again and the cheering men dropped their merriment to a minimum. But instead of simply nodding for the mage to continue, he asked a question. Impatience rang in his voice.
“Why does this news concern us, Mage Chris?”
His voice was so serious and monotonous that no one muttered a word when he finished. But Lya subconsciously knew the reason for the sudden silence because it was the one question on everybody’s mind tonight.

The mage turned his face straight to Handred. No longer did he look like a tired traveller but a battle knight filled with passion.
“Why does it concern? Why did you think we have journeyed? Are you not the people of Asuqaro? Have you not felt the pain of loss thirteen years ago? Our land in under threat again and all you ask is to be allowed sit in idle? Wake up Suvonians!”
And they certainly did. Even those in deep stupor and on the edge of snoring were suddenly jerked by magic.

Lya wondered if indeed magic were used in the mage’s words. But so far, Channeler Harrietta had not signalled her father that she felt that connection. Even so, the very name Suvon could entice passion fire of either hate or love, depending on how the story had been told. But hardly anyone ever speak of the great land before the Collapse. Hardly anyone even spoke of the lost past at all. And to her the name from the mouth of a mage...

But Handred Samuelson was not ready to back down yet. He stood with all the majesty Lya had ever seen him possessed, his walking stick looked like a sceptre.
“And I say this to you, Mage. Where were you and your fellows thirteen years ago? Where were even the King’s knights? The last of Uvounuq’s barbarians tore across our hamlet while you only concern is the King’s coronation. And you knew!”

Handred shook his walking stick at Mage Chris, his face twisted in temper.
“You knew our plight but did nothing! All that we’ve received was a parchment of apology and allegiance. The rider would not even stay to take my message of aid to your newly crowned leader. People of Asuqaro? No! We are Green Cliffs!”
He slammed his thick stick to the table to emphasize his word. The men rose and cheered, even the women cried in a mix of approval for her father and distaste for the mages.

But Chris Anasteq the Mage’s own fury had not been expunged. The man banged his fist on the table so hard that Lya jumped. And by the diminishing voices, so others were caught by surprise.
“Honest people! Did you think the blood of others were not as red? You whose children were spared from war, did you think it would never come to your door? Did you think the Nobility had spared you because they ignored you? If you would not answer to the Spirit which is Lost, then answer to your own history! Think, good people and answer me. How were you ever Green Cliffs to begin?”

This time, there were no voices that followed. Only silence as dead as the night that had long since fallen on Enatuh. But then a lone statement spoke without fear, but with clarity as if the man who stood and said the words knew in his heart of the truth what the mage had demanded.
“We were the Defenders Guard, by honour of Esaeni Aqens Order. We were all born to become soldiers.”
The man who spoke was Jaque Jaymeson.

To be continued...

Sloppy Joes!

Location: Inside the body of a gal with only a few $$$ in her purse.
Mood-of-the-day: HUNGRY!!!

Sloppy joes! Ever heard of them? I do and I love ‘em. And don’t just look at these; really get your mouse (and your teeth) on ‘em!


Basically, it a big burger bun or so...


Smothered with mice beef...


Cooked on a slow heat with spicy sauce...


It can’t be too neat like this!


WARNING: IT HAS TO BE OVERLOAD!



We got some of the little Joes...



A bit on the blurry side...


Temptation, temptation, temptation...


So enjoy your Sloppy Joe!

Cook chopped onions and garlic in a skillet. Brown ground beef over medium high heat. Add Taco Bell beef mix (can buy at any supermarket) and some water. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer for 10 minutes, stirring occasionally. Serve on toasted hamburger buns.

Signed: *Ophie, a tribute to Liann55 and hopes that she eats well :P

Weekend Blues (and Snooze)

Location: Follow the black asphalt road...
Mood-of-the-day: To blog, or NOT to blog. That is the question...

The first thing I noticed when I turned on the PC last Sunday morning was the demise of my lil’ Mimitchi. Arrggghhh!! The lil’ fella was just 17 years old (17 days old actually) and already a big spaceship dropped from the sky and took him away for a better(?) place. So what am I going to do? Well I’m not going to have a ghost haunting my desktop and I hatched another one! I’ll screen capture her later.

It still sucks that even after that trip to Megamall offers no success. I pretty much gave up on ever having an Internet connected wirelessly to my House. Last Saturday we got to the IT World shop (me chosen to be the one who get to lug the Compaq laptop) and the Joseph guy told us to wait for at least half an hour for the driver to be installed. Damn. But at least that means we can have lunch at the food courts.

Also while waiting, I took a visit to the shop next door. It sells PC games (Yes! Yes! Yes!). But all the games there seem to require a 3D card (No! No! No!). I looked through the RPG, and even those that could easily run on my old junk required a 3D card. I browsed at every little empty CD case as much as I can while the guy behind the cash counter looked as if he’s never seen a Malay girl in his shop before.

Well, the whole getting-Internet shebang was a downhill run from the start. As compensation, my dad brought some rambutans and mangosteens from one of these roadside stalls. The rambutans were great but the mangosteens were tiny. Either that, I hadn’t had mangosteens for so long that I’ve just outgrew them.And my mom too profited from her Old-Ladies-Gathering with some dessert munchies.

Last night, I watched the Tony awards last night. Not as popular as the Oscars or MTV I know but it was pretty interesting. For months I thought that a show based on the musical my dad had been ranting about was all boast fiction and the play doesn’t exist. Suddenly, there it was on Star World. A group of old Jewish farts in black coats and beards dancing a synchronized beat with beer bottles on their heads.

Though I might have confused Fiddler on the Roof with a reality show from New York. But I loved the way Hugh Jackman swings his golden ass to the music in Not the Boy Next Door musical. He’s sooo not playing that piano! But my favourite had to be the Avenue Q piece. About some down and out people and character rejects from Sesame Street living on a down low. They won the overall award in the end. Sure wasn’t sucks to be them!

Signed: *Ophie, who spend much of her weakness under the bedcovers

A letter from 12-yesr-old Ophie...

Location: In the Globe Goggling Cobwebs
Mood-of-the-day: Nostalgic, very nostalgic

I was rummaging through some of my old stuff as part of the Sunday’s Cleaning Day and you know what I’ve found? Tucked in between the pages of a business management book thick enough to kill somebody was an envelope full of nostalgia. I had almost forgotten that I’ve even had it. A letter to myself. Yeah, I know some of you would think it’s weird. But it’s like a diary actually.

Hence, at age 11, I was only beginning to like to write but I hated long essays. I got the idea from a Calvin and Hobbes comic strip and thus I wrote something to my 20-year-old self. It’s not a coincidence actually, to find this lost piece of childish POV just 6 days before my big 2-0. There’s always been something about that thick book that bothers me (and I’m not even taking business management).

------------------------

Dear Liza 20 years old,

Hey how are ya? This is yourself at Standard 6. I’m feeling great because my holidays are here. Have you got a boyfriend yet? Is he cute? How did you meet him? Well, I don’t suppose you can tell me since you’re in the future and all (just like Back to the Future) but I suppose I can tell you what I’ve been.

Wamad is being bratty again. He just wants to gaduh. I know I’m very bossy with my little brother and it’s more fun when you know you’re being bossy. I fight with him at mak and ayah’s room and now I forgot what we’re fighting about. Pencil colour maybe, but we fight all the way down the stairs and he bit my hand and now I think I have a scar. Do you have a scar? I hope not. I hate scars.

Didja get to sing at Asia Bagus yet? Was is good? Did you win? I’m still practising my singing. I like the song from Pocahontas, you remember? ‘Colours of the Wind’ I like that song and I know I can sing better. It must be great to be a singer and I hope you’re got to be one. Emma had already got to go to Asia Bagus with her group but I want to win.

Is Tun and Isaida still with you? Do you still have their number? Everyone says that Isaida and I look alike but I don’t think so. Maybe it’s because our second name Aini and Ain is alike. Tun is my best friend since kindergarten. Also Zurina’s dad got something weird in her house. There’s this huge antenna in her house. Mak says it’ll rosak other houses tv signal but I didn’t see any change.

I will take my UPSR soon. I also want to past my Teakwondo blue test soon and so I won’t have to be bullied by Suratkhabar. Is he still around? I hate him, he liked to bully me and so I want to hit him back. My dad says I should always run away but I don’t like to run. I want to fight. Did you managed to kick him? I hope he doesn’t bully you anymore. The other day he wanted 40 cents from me and so I gave him. But he hasn’t paid me back.

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There’s a lot more but I’ve summarised it. About 2 papers full. It’s amazing how a 2B pencil can last. If I can only answer that dreamy lil’ girl 8 years ago, I’ll say that I do still have that scar, Asia Bagus phenomena had been replaced by the Akedemi Fantasia and Malaysian Idols, I’ve lost contact with Tun and Isaida and had stopped Teakwono a long time ago.

Signed: *Ophie, the ‘Suratkhabar’ still owes her 40 cents from that BP encounter.